Is it my place to discern whether their relationship with God is more or less intimate than most? I love them as they are and believe they are made in God’s image, as the Bible teaches we all are.

Annie and Audrey’s disabilities are an inconvenience and perhaps uncomfortable for them, which makes my heart ache and spurs me on to look after their needs even better; to serve them with my whole heart. Of course toileting, bathing, dressing, and feeding are all duties I wish they could do independently but for what purpose? Right now, all of these tasks humble me and allow me continually to thank God for the many ways my life has been spiritually blessed, in the midst of fulfilling these tasks and needs.

It has been over a decade since Annie and Audrey were diagnosed with TSC and I have always felt I should pray for their healing, in spite of my being at peace with who they are, as they are. It’s another illogical piece of this puzzle I have been asked to put into place.

A section of study in my Beyond Suffering course shed light on why God has placed healing in my heart. Not because I expect them to not have TSC here on earth, but because they are human beings who need to know Jesus more intimately every day, no matter how much they appear to be unable to comprehend such complicated concepts.God is more interested in our spiritual healing than He is in our physical healing. It’s not for me to decide whether my girls need need prayer for healing/wholeness but it is up to me to pray as Jesus taught us, to call on His name when things seem out of control, to pray for healing when it doesn’t make sense, to pray in a tongue given by the Holy Spirit which I can’t understand and to expect great things because God is great. It takes the pressure off, knowing my job is really quite simple. Trust and obey.